Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
