My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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