Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
