you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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