Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
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