let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Randomize
