That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
