I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
