Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize