He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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