Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize