It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
