I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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