she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize