it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Randomize
