Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
