i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
