how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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