the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Randomize
