I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
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