come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
