fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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