I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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