we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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