her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Randomize
