I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
