Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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