if you like me you must not know who I am
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
