He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize