Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize
