normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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