so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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