it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
