How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
