just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Randomize
