if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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