Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Vodka?
Forever.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
