She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
