so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is this the sara with the beer cane?
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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