Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
sarcasm needs its own font
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
