if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize