She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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