Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
