She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
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