I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize