i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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