Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize