I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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