So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
