I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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