he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
