Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(916): View more from California

This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here

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(916): This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here http://tfl.nu/hb41

Replies (16) Good night (4898) Bad night (1141)
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(337): View more from Louisiana

The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party

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(337): The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party http://tfl.nu/w848

Replies (17) Good night (5040) Bad night (1737)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.

(478): View more from Georgia

Moment of silence for the loss of that option.

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(843): I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues. (478): Moment of silence for the loss of that option. http://tfl.nu/jcvy

Replies (29) Good night (2115) Bad night (7322)
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(406): View more from Montana

I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.

(1-406): View more from Montana

Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.

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(406): I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight. (1-406): Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it. http://tfl.nu/p8t9

Replies (10) Good night (3472) Bad night (963)
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(406): View more from Montana

well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded

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(406): well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded http://tfl.nu/5ng8

Replies (3) Good night (1901) Bad night (839)
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(305): View more from Florida

i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.

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(305): i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes. http://tfl.nu/n4c7

Replies (4) Good night (623) Bad night (1075)
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(815): View more from Illinois

Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it

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(815): Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it http://tfl.nu/8nv8

Replies (16) Good night (2405) Bad night (670)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...

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(336): Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text... http://tfl.nu/pmgt

Replies (5) Good night (1923) Bad night (501)
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(858): View more from California

There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.

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(858): There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie. http://tfl.nu/bbcq

Replies (5) Good night (1123) Bad night (352)
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to

(302): View more from Delaware

yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich

(302): View more from Delaware

wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in

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(603): I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to (302): yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich (302): wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in http://tfl.nu/z48g

Replies (9) Good night (751) Bad night (381)
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(870): View more from Arkansas

When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.

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(870): When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody. http://tfl.nu/gc8j

Replies (5) Good night (478) Bad night (389)
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(204): View more from Manitoba

I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE

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(204): I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE http://tfl.nu/94j1

Replies (6) Good night (331) Bad night (394)
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(270): View more from Kentucky

i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.

(618): View more from Illinois

dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.

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(270): i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast. (618): dude, she han solo'd you. keep her. http://tfl.nu/viok

Replies (2) Good night (1586) Bad night (370)
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(818): View more from California

Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"

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(818): Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww" http://tfl.nu/3o12

Replies (0) Good night (420) Bad night (591)
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(408): View more from California

She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.

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(408): She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up. http://tfl.nu/zn3k

Replies (4) Good night (457) Bad night (593)

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