I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS